In these last days of summer Carly Simon’s song ‘Anticipation’ has been playing in my head. It really hits home for me right now. This is why.
My experience at university has encompassed everything I wanted it to be and much more. I can remember 3 years ago at the brink of my first year being so nervous. I had no idea what I wanted to do. But things began to fall in place. I remember staying up all night in orientation week with friends that I continue to grow with to this day. I was scared of things to come, but anticipating it all. We entered that world with a childlike excitement of things to come. I loved them then, I love them now. As time passed where I was heading just made sense. Teaching, theatre, history… these things are written deeply in my spirit. They found me as much as I found them. I tried to run away sometimes, but each of these callings beckoned me back time and time again.
Fast forward to now.
This summer has stretched me in ways I am just beginning to see. I was Robbie-less for 2 months and still managed to have a blast, I worked my hiney off, I became an Auntie again, I learned how to relax at the cabin for the first time, I got a pretty good tan, I fell back in love with cardigans, I caught up with alot of amazing woman, and I started paying car insurance for the first time in my life. It has been the summer of learning my capacity for independence (and shopping). I don’t speak of an independence that shuns the help and generosity of others, but one that discovers and expresses the understanding of self. It is an independence that risks, hopes, and dreams. I think the next step is to see the fruit of these endeavors.
I can feel the excitement running through my blood. I am of the opinion that this year I will start to see the fruit of years of stored up learning of self, knowledge of craft, and love of others.
I hope its full of sweet fruit like nectarines and peaches and strawberries. I hope I can blend a whole bunch of fruits into a delicious smoothie and then share it. Whatever it is, I’m ready. I’m ready to dive in and get wet. I’m ready to be crazy busy and barely sleep. I’m ready to learn from the wise people who I adore. I’m ready to keep going. I’m ready to let friendship blossom and flower. (And I hope its a tulip)
It may be Earl Grey talking, but I am certain that life is fantastic.
So Carly I give you a big ditto on these golden words, “Stay right here, cause these are the good old days.”